Kyleigh Thompson

F.A.T.

Dear Female Adult Trainee,

Welcome to the military! We’re so glad you could join us. However, we need to address a few things below:

From now on, you can no longer have hips, curves, or breasts. All of those will slow you down and keep you from our goals. Try to eat less as well; we don’t need an unhealthy trainee.

Furthermore, you are not allowed to weigh more than our charts—always remember the charts! That way you’ll be able to stay in shape and keep to the goals of the military.

The first thing you should do every morning is weigh yourself. A scale can be provided, of course! Then turn in your weights each week so we can make sure you are healthy.

Finally, know that any taping that you need will disqualify you from advancement in rank. An obese leader is a bad leader (unless it’s a male).

Thank you so much for your understanding, and please hesitate to reach out.

Best regards,
The United States Military